Pune: If a random person is scrolling through social media, sitting at their home in any part of the country, Pune-based content dominates their feed no matter where they are situated. A common perception among Indians regarding Pune is its messed-up dating culture. Loads of videos can be seen where Pune is stereotyped with multiple terms when it comes to dating. However, the question remains -- is this the ground reality?
Watch Reels On Instagram About Pune's Dating Culture:
Two Sides of Pune
One side of Pune, the historical perspective, tells us that Pune is the cultural capital of Maharashtra, the Oxford of the East, and many other things that have traditionally claimed Pune to be a great city. But a massive amount of content is being produced on social media, where these claims have turned the tide. One of the claims includes Pune's apparent screwed-up dating culture.
Some famous stereotypes include: Punekars are cheaters; everyone is each other's ex in Pune; if your partner is living in Pune, then there is definitely infidelity ongoing. These are some of the main ways Pune is being portrayed. What began as sarcasm and satire has turned into most people believing it as fact. Recently, a reel went viral claiming you have to worry if your partner is not responding to your calls or working too late. It was mentioned that you have to worry more if they live in Pune, implying infidelity associated with the city.
How Did It All Begin?
The perception of Pune’s dating culture as chaotic, overly casual, and rife with infidelity began during COVID. City residents note that Pune attracted students and young professionals from across India, creating a diverse and temporary population. This event coincided with the rise of dating apps like Tinder, Bumble, and Instagram interactions. It transformed how people met and shifted connections from traditional social circles to virtual spaces.
Some experts also claim that early viral stories of scams, ghosting, and casual “situationships” added fuel to the narrative. Platforms like Reddit, where people share their experiences, gained traction. Pune's population was one of the first communities to be active in this. Social media amplified these experiences through memes, reels, and threads. They exaggerated incidents for humour and relatability. Over time, jokes about interconnected ex-lists, casual relationships, and cheating became widespread. This has given Pune a reputation as a city where dating is performative, short-lived, and often unpredictable.
These narratives are most of the time satirical, but people don’t take them that way. People believe what they see on social media, and it triggers their thinking.
What Do Punekars Say About Their Dating Culture?
The Free Press Journal spoke with a variety of Punekars, particularly young adults. The responses we received were diverse and interesting.
Rishi Shinde, a 21-year-old working professional, said, "The case with Pune is not very much different than other metro cities. The place doesn’t matter when it comes to a partner; it’s actually the person who matters. The people who came from outside for studies and all have misused the freedom they got here. Being away from their families has triggered this in my opinion. That’s why some reckless people of my age can be seen. But as I said, this is a situation in every big city in India. To be fair, yes, Pune's social media reputation is in shambles, but I really do not care about it."
Geeta Deshpande, a 19-year-old student in a Kothrud-based college, said, "I have never really dated anyone. I’m a native of Satara District. But from what my friends say, it’s very hard to find a good partner here. I don’t know about other cities’ situations. But many of my girl besties’ boyfriends are problematic. My idea of an ideal boyfriend does not match theirs. But I don’t think it’s Pune's fault because people like this exist everywhere."
Manisha Koli, a 27-year-old married homemaker and resident of Sangvi, said, "I met my husband in Pune. We met in college and married three years ago. I didn’t date anyone apart from him. He was born and brought up in Pune District. I am a native of Ratnagiri. Well, even I have noticed the trend on social media where Pune's dating culture is slapped everywhere. I don’t know how it originated. It was not during my time."
Shashank Jadhav, an 18-year-old student in an Akurdi-based college, said, "Social media made me think that it’s easy to get into a relationship in Pune. My feed was filled with things like, ‘If you are not able to find a partner in Pune, you won’t find it anywhere.’ I installed a dating app and started scrolling around. I got a few matches; they were good. But nothing worked out much. Believing social media in things like this is actually useless. It’s heavily biased, and although it provides a platform for people to express their opinions, it doesn’t really help."
Shravani Jonapalle, a 20-year-old student in a Tathawade-based college, said, "My friend group is the real example of how Pune is portrayed on social media. The dating happens within the group. There is no bro code visible, nor is there any ‘move-on’ period seen. One relationship breaks, and the other starts within weeks. Maybe what social media says is true to some extent."
Varad Mane, a 32-year-old working professional from Hinjawadi, said, "I really wouldn’t be able to clarify if what social media says is real or not. But yeah, according to social media, it seems dating culture in Pune and Bengaluru is messed up. My friends from outside the city taunt me about it too. I have a girlfriend who is native to Pune. My friends from outside the city, who have never been here, always taunt me about it. They jokingly say, ‘Call her and make sure she is not cheating.’ I mean, it’s not really good for you to judge a person based on social media. With time, I have learnt to ignore it."
