It is often stated that talking is living. Through talks with others, one expresses emotions, sentiments, and feelings about several aspects of life. A normal person in prime youth spends roughly 3 to 4 hours minimum in talking either at home or at the office or with friends. The more a person talks, the more he / she shares the internal emotions and thereby gets lighter at heart. That’s what psychologically we talk about trait of a person: an “extrovert” would like to talk more and that too freely while an “introvert” avoids interaction with others and keeps emotions / feelings to himself / herself. This is not to say that introverts are inferior; they sometimes derive more energy from being alone or in smaller groups. But extroverts are often seen in social circles as confident, cheerful and socially/emotionally more connected.
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Relevance for Elderly:
This concept of being extrovert of talking more with others becomes more important for the elderly. As old age sets in, a sense of “helplessness” creeps being physically & mentally weaker and away from busy activities of life. Besides the office space, friend circle also keeps shrinking in size. This loneliness results in less talking by many elderly. If this continues for a long time, depression might set in and result in total withdrawal from active life.
The antidote to the above is to talk and talk to whomever one can. One can talk to one’s family members, friends, residents of the place where one stays or even to total strangers.
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Talking has several benefits:
1. It takes away the stress of life or at least mitigates their impact and intensity.
2. Talking improves the functioning of lungs and many other vital physical parameters.
3. Talking with friends reminds one of the joys of the past and re-energizes the mind.
4. It increases the sense of connectedness and thereby improves attitude towards life and enhances sense of happiness. It also augments self-esteem.
5. It reduces the sense of loneliness and relieves the stress arising out of depression and withdrawal syndrome.
6. Finally talking helps to garner more friends and creates a sense of trust among the people who constantly interact. The happy hormone “Oxytocin” is often associated while we talk to our loved ones including friends.
Thus, we see that there are several advantages of talking. The only disadvantages can be that we use extra energy by talking more and more and maybe that some people will try to avoid us as we talk more. That’s quite natural and therefore, elders must not overdo anything including “over talking” so that you become acceptable.
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Talking Habits and Enabling Environment:
Talking power / strength often goes down with old age. It is on account of both physical waning (in terms of weakness of muscles) and cognitive decline (lesser comprehension or working memory). Research has also shown that many elders find the “background noise” or “talks by others” very annoying and distracting. Therefore, they sometimes tend to talk less and become quiet. Some elderly people go on rambling (uttering less understandable words) once again because of cognitive decline. Elders can also talk less if they have hearing problems. In extreme cases, elders may also develop “Dysphasia” which is the loss of ability to speak; this happens when part of the brain that is responsible for production of sound and meaning is damaged. Elders suffering from Parkinson’s are sometimes found to suffer from what is known as Dysarthria i.e., slurred or slow speech.
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However, the above are some of the extreme cases. We as elders must make it a point to understand that talking has great benefits to both “physical” as well as “mental wellbeing” and that its strength needs to be kept intact.
Here comes the importance of making talking a habit. An enabling environment should be created at all places including family set up where elders can talk and talk freely. There can be a “talking time” every day where the family members spend time with their elders and encourage them to interact on topics the elders like. Same way, the school / college students should visit the old age homes or places like park corners, etc. where elderly people sit in silence and encourage them to talk. Helping and motivating the elders to talk is a great way whereby all of us can create a facilitating environment where elders can “talk and talk freely”. The senior citizen clubs or groups provide an ideal platform for free interaction among elderly.
In conclusion, we can say that elders must talk if they want to live happily. Constant talking by elders is an essential component of happy aging. Let’s create an environment where elders not only live with dignity but also can talk openly & freely.
Article by Dr A K Sen Gupta, Chief Trustee, My Retired Life Foundation (MRLF).
