Guiding Light: Getting Over The Fear Of Death

Almost everyone has a fear of death. Many say, “It is not death that we fear, but being incapacitated and dependent on others.” All that may be true, but behind that is a lurking fear of death. And we are also quick to jump to the conclusion that it is a fear of the unknown. What is unknown is rarely feared. You can't be afraid of what I have in my house for the simple reason that you don't know. But if you start speculating — maybe there is a snake/tiger, then naturally, you will be afraid. So, one reason for the fear of death is the speculation about what is going to be up. This, of course, can be partially overcome if one has a spirit of adventure that, “I am willing to see what is there on the other side.”

Another reason for fear is the fear of loss. In fact, all fear comes from a fear of loss. We don't want to lose what we have — our relations, our partners, our children, our friends, the security that we are used to. We know that death involves giving up all that and many of us are not ready to let go. It is difficult to let go. To help us with this, various religions paint very rosy ideas of life hereafter to keep us on the straight and narrow path as well as a picture of the other side of pain and suffering. At the most this can be some solace for an ordinary human mind. To get over the fear one needs to understand the spiritual basis of life itself. 

As Vedanta says the only question worth asking or answering is “Who am I?” Once you discover who you really are, as the pure limitless consciousness who was always present, you will see birth and death as just two small apparent incidents. Only then can one really be free from the fear of death. Until then we learn to manage it. 

The writer is the founder of Aarsha Vidya Foundation. You can write to him at aarshavidyaf@gmail.com